Lesson 1 - Joyful Practice of Human Connection

Growing up (until Nanny moved to the care home) my sisters and I spent literally everyday at

Nanny and Granddads. They did the school runs, made us breakfast and tea, if we were ever poorly it was the best because we got to spend the day with Nanny. We played there, watched TV there - anything from old black and white movies to classic Bond, Prisoner Cell Block H and the soaps. Ultimately we spent quality time there surrounded by love, care and kindness. All our friends knew Nanny, the people on the street and their children too, the amount of biscuits she must have given out! The main thing was Nanny really knew us, because of that she cherished, encouraged and supported us in all aspects of our life, choices and with no judgement and there was always that sense of belonging. Nanny definitely was my life educator and taught me about human connection.

Nanny Dot, Sisters & I, 1990

Joyful Practice of Human Connection

I was reminded of growing up at Nanny's whilst listening to a TED Talk from Rita Pieson - Every Kid Needs a Champion . In this talk Rita shares her wealth of experience of education and the importance of believing in students, building relationships  that are meaningful, and encourage them. The whole talk is underpinned by human connection, how it can actually make a difference both educationally and personally. 

Rita brilliantly tells of a time when a colleague said 

"They don't pay me to like the kids" 

and she responds in the most perfect way

 "Kids don't learn from people they don't like" 

Kids remember those teachers who have had a positive impact on their life, they remember those teachers who were kind. When I think back I don't have memory of any teacher like this, other than my life educator. I know from this experience how important human connection is, to have compassion and empathy no matter what - students drop out for all kinds of reasons including poverty, peer pressure and even the pressure of college itself (this happened to me), sadly we still see this today in our educational settings. 

How can teachers change this?

Primary School

My son, Isaac, 9lb 5oz gorgeous baba is now 9 and in year 5 at primary school. Around year 1, Isaac became very self-conscious, he had a stutter and lacked confidence in class. He really struggled with the change from nursery to school, he was very nervous and was bullied for several years. Isaac, always the biggest in the class, born looking ready for the rugby pitch but he hated how he looked, he hated how other kids would say things about his size and although he would go to school no problem, he didn't like it much, always feeling in the background. As a parent it was my responsibility to do something, create connection with the teachers, I struggled to make that connection - his past teachers were not so forthcoming.

Isaac, 2021 Rugby Presentation

We started Isaac at football, karate - still Isaac lacked confidence and did not build relationships with the other kids or the coaches, he still felt he was in the background. After several years of me and Dad saying - 'he should be a rugby player' we took him along to the local rugby club and oh my, the saying duck to water...this is Isaac with rugby. 

As he started year 5 and he met his new teacher, Mr L. It turned out he was an ex rugby pro - the difference this has made to Isaac, having that connection, someone who is interested in him. Mr L is amazing, he knows Isaacs background at the school, his ways, his interests, his family and involved Isaac in unique and Isaac felt he belonged. The point here is that Mr L showed compassion, kindness and put human connection before the 9 times table - this came after!

Isaac has thrived this year at school, Mr L has seen him play at Headingley (Leeds Rhinos), we have a
Google Drive folder and Mr L has seen many of his rugby matches, even playing the video recordings in the classroom for the class to watch (other kids started asking Isaac for his autograph). Isaac hasn't changed, we wouldn't want that but he has developed, he has found his voice - Mr L has been that  connection between Isaac and the other children, he brought them together by taking time to understand. Isaac has since been awarded parents player, players player awards and recently chosen to be the captain, 12 months ago there is no way he would have got on a stage in front of 100s of people, Mr L and the rugby coaches at Limehurst Lions have so much to do with this. Because the teacher and coach cared. Because the teacher and coach took time. Because the teacher and coach put connection before results.

Further Education

We often hear negative terms such as 'disadvantaged' 'hard to reach' 'at risk'  about the students we
teach,  however is this the case? Or is it that barriers such as immense pressures in FE, including funding, contact time, policies, workload...is what are 'hard to reach! 

As teachers the ones who have direct contact with students, we can certainly adapt our practices to create a class environment which has a sense of belonging, we can champion students and encourage them - this takes no time! We can be kind, we can ask instead of tell.

Recently, I have seen human connection that has blown me away, an FE tutor apologising to an ESOL student in their first language, the same tutor is also studying the Quran to gain a better understanding of cultural backgrounds and religion - to develop that connection! The lessons in this class are not just amazing because the students pass, they are amazing because of the relationships this tutor has built with each individual, the students are thriving in every way possible. Connection is what came first and this is what demonstrates success, they have never been hard to reach because of their socio-cultural backgrounds, the inspirational FE tutor adapted so prevent this.

When I started teacher training and in my first few years of teaching, I was advised not to show emotion, not to share anything personal, you are not their friend. As a trainee/NQT you believe this to be the right thing to do, because that is the advice you are given from the experienced.. God I have learnt a lesson from this. I am certainly not in the classroom to be robotic or operate like a production line, churning out distinctions. My teaching practice developed quite quickly when I realised these are humans, they have needs. 

I should, as a professional in a job I have chosen to do, take responsibility to develop an understanding of their socio-economic and cultural backgrounds...YES that is my responsibility to build human connection. Let's face it, if a student has an appointment or illness which means they can't submit work, sit an exam etc, the policy  is to ask for evidence/doctors note, but what about everything else?  how can life be evidence?, there is no note for that BUT we can know our students, encourage them like Mr L and FE Tutor has, champion and believe in them like Rita talks about - even if sometimes it goes against the grain.

I often share my story with students, its important that they know we are also human. If they ask questions, honesty is key. This does not make us unprofessional it makes us real. Professionally we can learn about teaching techniques, effective assessment and feedback to achieve distinctions, retrieval practice etc...A LOT of time is spent on this. 

However, I feel there is a huge gap in the availability of 'real life' professional learning - development in terms of the local area in which you teach, in the different cultures around us and the different experiences students face on a daily basis. Walk the route, bus the route - it certainly will be an extra stone stepped across the river, enabling the other side of the landscape less 'hard to reach' (looks very different when flipped). I count myself lucky to have grown up and still live in the local area where I work, so many teachers haven't, which is why professional learning for real life is crucial, especially in these political and economic times.

When someone passes away, reflection on their life and your relationship happens naturally. Remembering the person they were, shared experiences, especially when they have had a positive impact on your life. Watching Rita's Ted Talk it resonated with me how this related to my Nanny and the person she was, yes she cared for us but also showed kindness and compassion to others, she took time, never judged or thought she was better,  she told stories and provided that sense of belonging no matter what, championing everyone. 

Rita Pierson

So many lessons can learnt from Mr L, FE tutor, Rita and my Nanny, driven by the ability to build
human connection - this is what comes first, this is what makes us human. Educational settings which put emotions, connection and relationships first can make a world of difference, these are the words of Rita, underpinned by so many values in just a few seconds...

"Teaching and Learning should bring joy,

how powerful would our world be 

if we had kids who were not afraid to take risks,

who were not afraid to think, and who had a champion?

Every child deserves a champion, 

an adult who will never give up on them,

who understands the power of connection,

and insists that they become the best that can possibly be.

Is this job tough? You betcha. Oh God, you betcha.

But it is not impossible.

We can do this. We're educators. 

We're born to make a difference."

- Rita Pierson - Every Kid Needs a Champion, 2013     

This reminded me of my Nanny, of teachers JUST WOW!!!

Nanny Dot, My Educator

Next week: Lesson 2 - The Joyful Unicorn 

Stacey Salt, FE Educator

@TutorStacey_AP